NFL Week Two in Review – Houston Texans vs. Washington Redskins

The Redskins played the Houston Texans on Sunday, and it was quite a game.  My daughter (on the left) and her college roommate came all the way from North Carolina for the game, just to go from ‘all smiles’ to ‘nobody talk to me’.  Although we didn’t come away with a victory, it was a very entertaining game.  When the Redskins lose a game, my whole week is pretty scrambled.  I mean…my ability to think straight is reduced, my tolerance for (all) people decreases, even my fabulous sense of humor suffers…and we all know aint nuthin’ funny ‘bout that!  

Here, Vee, Mamma Portis and I smile before the game.  We had to smile before the game, because it was only shock and disbelief on our faces as the game slowly (but surely) slipped away.

The Redskins had several opportunities to win the game…clearly not enough.  For every good Redskins statistics, the Texans had a better stat.  Check out these game day stats:

·         The Redskins scored on their first three possessions. (First time doing that since 2003.)

·         The Texans scored the last four scoring drives. (We got tired from all that early scoring.)

·         The Texans had 5 penalties for 45 yards.  (Cool, that’s almost half the field.)

·         The Redskins had 7 penalties for 58 yards. (Damn, that is more than half the field.)

·         The Redskins had a 17 point lead, with 5:31 left in the 3rd Quarter.  (Yeah Baby!!)

·         This brings me back to the last four Texans scoring drives! (20 unanswered points. Ugh!!)

·         The Redskins Defense had 1 INT and 5 sacks!! (Defense!! Defense!!)

·          The Redskins had 1 INT and 5 sacks, but Schaub still passed for 497 yards.  (This guy!!)

·         The Redskins Offense racked up 421 net yards. (Offense!! Offense!!)

·         The Texans Defense held our rushing game to 17 attempts for 18 yards. (Wait…what??)

·         The Texans Kicker, Rackers, missed a 47 yard FG...it was wide right. (Hee-hee!!)

·          The Redskins Kicker, Gano, missed a 52 yard FG...it was wide right. (NO fair!! He made the 1st one!!)

·         The Redskins lost the coin toss in overtime, but stopped the Texans. (Our turn for the ball, Baby!!)

·         The Redskins lost the coin toss, stopped the Texans but couldn’t score. (Their turn for the ball!!)

·         The Redskins had five scoring drives resulting in 3 Touchdowns and 2 FGs.

·         The Texans had six scoring drives resulting in 3 Touchdowns and 3 heartbreaking FGs.

I have to admit; the Texans played the entire game and never gave up.  The Redskins need to learn to stop letting leads slip away.  The entire state of Texas had to be glad to see the Texans start the season 2-0, especially against the Redskins.  However, I will cheer with half of the state in wishing the Texans go on to achieve a 3-0 start next week. (They play the Cowboys!!)

This Diva is Done!

NFL Week Two – Houston Texans vs. Washignton Redskins

The Redskins are playing the Houston Texans on Sunday.  Since the Texans joined the NFL in 2002, these two teams have only matched-up twice.  The first game was in Week 16 of the 2002 season; the Redskins killed the Texans 26-10 at FedEx Field. (Slightly Smiles!!) The second game was in Week 3 of the 2006 Season; the Redskins whipped the Texans 31-15 at Reliant Stadium. (Wide smile & Chuckles!!) Despite these two mere encounters, some of the personnel on both teams are very familiar with each other.  Ten of the coaches that will be on the sidelines on Sunday are former members of the Denver Broncos coaching staff; actually the Texans now have two Coordinators and three Assistants who worked under Mike Shanahan in Denver.  The clincher is that Houston’s Head Coach, Gary Kubiak, played…er ah, was on the team…(wispers…bench rider) for the Denver Broncos from 1983 to 1991, while our beloved Head Coach, Mike Shanahan, was a coach (in some capacity) for the Denver Broncos for 20 of the last 26 years.  Wow!!!  This game may have a real ‘Gunslinger’ feel to it. 

Wait… enough about good ole times with the Denver Broncos.  There will be no John Elway there…we have McNabb.  There will be no Champ Baily there…we have Clinton Portis.  Do you remember that trade? (Covers mouth & Snickers!!)   After all, this is a Redskins game.  And we are in DC!! None other than FedEx Field…home of the Washington Redskins.  It is also the home to Chuck Brown, the God-Father of Go-Go.  As a matter of fact, he is the scheduled halftime performer for Sunday’s game.  Just like all audience members’ plea to Chuck at his shows…Wind me up Chuck!! Meanwhile, I am already wound up.  The Redskins need to pickup things right where they left off last week as we cleaned the clock of that other Texas team.  (Full blown laughter!!)  Just in case you need me to Back It on Up, I will remind you… that game was decided in the last 3 seconds!!  Favorable for the ‘Skins, may I add.  After that climactic finish, we continued to party in the parking lot.  It was almost midnight, but no one cared.  Daylight could have come, but we didn’t want to go home.   On Sunday, as a faithful football screamer, I not only plan on screaming, but I intend to yell, cheer, shout, & Coo.  You know…Coo.  We aren’t yelling Boo, we are yelling Coooooley!!)  I am proud to be that 12^th Man that the Redskins rely on. The atmosphere of the place will have a Go-Go Swing to it as our defense orders another Stormy Monday for their opponent.  (Holds stomach, doubles over & chackles!!)

On the other hand, we Redskins fans cannot get too excited about our prior performances against the Texans, because that was in the past.  In fact, most Redskins fans don’t know what to make of the Texans this week other than the fact that they beat the Colts last Sunday.   Oh wait…we do know a lot about them, or at least Kyle Shanahan, Mike’s handsome son, does. (Giggles!!) His job last year was with the Texans.  (Points at team and laughs a Dr. Evil laugh!!)  The game cannot get here fast enough, but first I have a few questions:

·         Do You Know What Time It Is?  - Its 4:15pm, late game action.

·         Anyone want to bet on this game? - I Need Some Money!!

·         The prior relationships and our 2- 0 records means?  – It Don’t Mean a Thing!!

·         What shall I do immediately after the victory? – Get Your Freak On!!

·         Why? Because We came to Party!!

This Diva is Done!

NFL Week One in Review – Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins

The Washington Redskins started the new season with a win against the Dallas Cowboys.  It was a pretty decent solid game of football to say the least.  Since I cannot talk too much trash about our overall performance, I will acknowledge that work still needs to be done on both sides of the ball for the Redskins.  On the other hand a victory is a VICTORY.  I see no need in dwelling on the negative aspects of the game especially since this victory did what it always does. It places a certain calm over the city and provides some level of peace in the hearts of Redskins fans alike.  Plus, I get the added bonus of talking more trash to the Dallas fanatics for at least another 3 months.  I know the afterglow of this successful game will be short lived, but it makes watching any Sports programming much easier.  I don’t have to mute the TV or leave the room when the News goes to the Sports segment, and I don’t have to avoid watching SportsCenter, PTI, or the halftime NFL highlights during MNF.   In summary, I’ll just move on to the positives…my day and the end result.  Yeah!!, the end result that came with only .03 seconds on the clock while my heart thumped out of my ample breast…yeah, THAT end result. However, instead of talking highlights, let me share my season opening day.

The day before the game, I attended a Wine Festival so when I went to sleep, shall I say…I was a little tipsy.  Tipsy or not, the game was on my mind as I slept.  Sadly, I slept like a kid awaiting the first day of school.  I woke up with butterflies in my stomach, (…or was that a wine hangover??? Hmmm?)  I was as nervous as if I was about to make my NFL debut.  Later, I spoke to my girlfriends that were going to the game with me to finalize our plans, as I watched NFL Countdown & the NFL of FOX.  You know… just to hear what the latest media comments were about my darling Redskins…typical stuff, but nothing new.  I made the meatballs.  Oh yeah, I CAN cook.  Every Redskins home game, I make the meatballs for my tailgating crew.  (Can I just say, I gets compliments.  OKaaay? OK!)  Seriously, after getting things on the home front all situated, I carefully placed my ‘curly Redskins R’ & ‘Redskins helmet’ magnets on my burgundy car & began the drive to FedEx Field.  I listened to Sirius NFL coverage and got highly pissed as I listened to the Giants refusing to lose their dumb game, but I digress.

Arriving at the parking lot to tailgate (we don’t tailgate for preseason games) after so many months away, almost brought tears to my eyes.  After eating like a pig & drinking like a fish, (not really, I drink responsibly), we went into the stadium.  At this point I am very very nervous because the kickoff is getting close and we are playing Dallas afterall.  I am harassing fools wearing their musky Dallas attire, while giving the royal treatment to wise intelligent people that properly have on Redskins gear… as any self respecting Redskins fan does.  The game starts and it was enjoyable.  Some fans get all caught up on certain statistics. Sometimes I do, but when the numbers are not favorable to me, I only care about one statistic...

·         Dallas had more 1^st downs (24 vs. 17) Big deal!!

·         Dallas had more total plays (71 vs. 56) Who cares??

·         Dallas had more total yards (380 vs. 250) Whateva!!

·         Dallas had more time (34:03 vs. 25:57) What did they do with that time, huh???

·         Dallas had more TURNOVERS (1 vs. 0) I love you DeAngelo Hall!!

·         Redskins had more POINTS! (13 vs. their stinky ole 7) Hail to the Redskins!!!

This Diva is Done!  ...and so is this Drunk Dallas Dude!!!

NFL Week One – Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins

The Washington Redskins start the new season with a ‘must-win-game’ Sunday night against the Dallas Cowboys.  With all the hype and hoopla that surrounded this team during the off season and all the high expectations placed on the new arrivals; a loss will immediately place devastation and panic in the hearts of many Redskins fans.  …Not that devastation is unfamiliar to us…but it hurts each and every time just the same.

We Redskins fans have been constantly strung along; similar to what CRACK does to addicts.  The organization (crack) makes us fans feel sooo good with the possibility of HOPE.  You cannot  get a legal & safe HIGH greater than HOPE.  With each good off season action (puff and drag), our high grew and grew.  There was the parade of new arrivals…the GM, the QB, the draft picks, etc.  Yet, with every offseason headline (hangover), our high was blown and the great high, became a miserable low.  There was all of the national negative press about our beloved Albert H.  …You know Albert H; the man that the football world loves to hate. The drama that started with a huge check in the spring, then it continued with a no show at mini-camp, and the various medical issues; my favorite was the “HEADACHES”.  But in true addict fashion, who cares how bad I look? Or how bad I feel?  Or how bad I am viewed?  Besides, what have any of the Redskins haters done for me lately? If you are about to get me my next fix…where da party at??  Let’s get it on!!   I’ll party with you, you foolish Dallas fan, you! “Where?”, you say? …8pm…Sunday… Sept 12^th… FedEx Field.  Whachu gots to say?   If you can’t get me my next fix, keep your silly ignorant comments to yourself!!  (I’ll deal with you Houston people next week, so get ready!!) 

 Seriously, being a Redskins fans has me acting just like a fiend.  The front office and the players can get me high, and ohh does it feel so so good.  While trying to get my bearings straight, I stumble in the euphoria or shame as appropriate.  Then, this same lover of sorts, kicks me directly in the teeth as my high wears down.  Ultimately, without missing a beat, the very next day, or sometimes, later that night, I am looking for my next fix.  All the while, I’m mouthing off with craziness like, “that’s all right, we had issues. Yeah, you won the game, but you didn’t ‘beat’ us”. Insanity!!  My rollercoaster love affair with the Redskins over the last few months went like this:

·         Off season acquisitions and hires look promising.  -Yay!!

·         Off season antics with million $$ checks & HGH arrests in the headlines.  -Aww!! 

·         The Million $$ man shows up, with a reduction in weight & looking good.  -Wow!!

·         But #92 can’t pass a basic test without collapsing, or a potty break.  -What??

·         The preseason has arrived- we get to see action (McNabb in a Skins jersey).   -Great!!

·         Oh_oo, #92 is getting too much action-…in the 4^th quarter.  -Huh??

·         We had a decent preseason.  -Cool!!

·         But there was drama. -Damn!!

·         So it’s a new season.  -Let’s Go!!!

·         But there is still drama.  -Awe Hell Naw!!  

·         We’ve got Dallas… at home… to open the season.  -Hail to the Redskins!!

·         We still got #92… at home… to open the season.  -Now what?

This Diva is Done!